To find my way

In these days, I always have a feeling that I have lost my way, I hardly know where I should go. When I have spare time, I am more inclined to recall the past college years that recorded my endeavor,my tears,and unforgettable schooling and part-time job experiences. Some person says if you think of your past hard-working process,you are touched and cry,then it demonstrates you really tried your best before. I must adimit, I did all I could to study in the college,and I have a specific goal, I know exactly what I want, at that time, I cherish every second to study ,when I have no classes ,I went out to teach some kids and earn some money to afford myself. Nothing can interrupt my steps ,my mind and my determination.But now, I finally got what I was in pursuit of when i was in college,however, I lost my previous motivation,my strong determination.Maybe,it is the present life changed my mind.Better school apartments,regular allowances,more beautiful surroundings,more colorful entertaiments,all of these make me gradually forget my four years hard-working experience. Sweet defeats bitter.Nonetheless,this is not my aim.I desire to be more excellent,I want to make some achievements in my field, I dream to be a successful person. Still on the way to realize my dream, I lost my previous perservarance,persistence. I think I must reflect on my own now, I can't be lured by the outside world, I should closely grasp my dream. Once one has no dream,then he or she finds life tedious and boring. I come from a poor family, I should consistenly keep in mind that my parents are still in the poverty,I have to take responsibility for them ,for myself and for my future. In middle school,one of my classmate gave up her school life,while I persisted,then she went home to do farmwork, I successfully entered a high school. In high school, when most students were sleeping or playing games, I was carefully and silently handling my study,my great endeavor made myself popular in the whole school ,then I successfully became a member of a better college,shocking and surprising many people.In college,I still did what I thought was right,getting up early,counting every seconds to study,bravely overcoming any difficulties,I tried all I could to make myself strong,similarly,I became a popular star in my faculty.When other classmates were concerning about finding a job, my mind was not affected,because I had only one goal, I wanted to persue further study. All my friends wittnessed my endeavor for my goal,they adimired me,and were glad to help me in order to let me study concentratedly. Then,I was successful again just I had dreamed before, I had chances to have further study. But ,the past glories have gone,everything should restart. Now I know why I come to this step,because I am afraid to fail, I am too satisfied with the present life. I want to change the present situation,I could not let my parents down,let my friends down. The present me,is not that strong, and I am not in the age to enjoy the life,what I should do is to work hard. Fortunately,it  is not too late to recognize this. I believe I could do as well as before. Good luck for myself!